Thursday, July 26, 2012

Kitchen MacGyver

Egg whites are good for a lot of things -
lemon meringue pie, angel food cake, and clogging up radiators.
- MacGyver

I will only concur on the pie and Angel Food Cake.   I'm sure you've all had angel food cake from the grocery.  Most of it tastes like Styrofoam.  Making one from scratch isn't the easiest thing to make, but  if you wear your special MacGyver pants for cooking,  it helps, as do detailed instructions. 

That being said, some baked items can take a little practice.  Should your spouse or friend be kind enough to attempt this recipe, remember, like with handymen, there are certain things one should NOT say while your loved ones attempts such things. 

Phrases to avoid saying to either a handyman OR chef.

Is this all you've done all day?
What exactly IS that?
Isn't the top supposed to be level?
How much did you spend on THIS?
I'll get the broom and the dustbin.
Am I holding it the right way?
What's that little thing sticking out of the top.
Maybe we should check our homeowners policy before we try it

And the worst?

Insert an ex's name here 's never looked like that!

Even a lopsided angel food cake is good (but remember the part about not greasing the pan so the batter can climb up the sides and cook evenly).  If it's not perfect (or even if it is) it makes a dandy dessert for special guests.

Top some cubes of this cake fresh from the oven with ripe strawberries, a little vanilla bean ice cream and a drizzle of honey and serve in a Champagne glasses.  Your guests won't care about how long it took, the mess you made of the counter or whether there is flour all over the seat of your MacGyver britches.


  1. Flour on the seat of your McGyver britches?

    The best part of angel food cake is the crusty parts you scrape from the pan, right after removing the cake.

  2. armedlaughing - I do get it everywhere. My Mom used to laugh that I could make Koolaid and half half of the sugar would be perfectly and evenly distributed on her kitchen floor.

  3. Does this mean I have to put clothes on to cook? I mean, what with the Naked Chef series and everything I thought I was ahead of the curve.
    Damn bacon splatters can leave scars though.

  4. Looks yummy, and don't forget the chocolate angel food cake variation using Dutch Processed Cocoa. And the best part is the cake is low in fat; the ice cream is another story.

  5. YUM!!! Had that on the 4th, and it was GREAT!

  6. "Flour on the seat of your McGyver britches"?

    Naw. I usually manage to get a fairly even coating all over the front of me and on the my butt of my britches where I have been wiping my hands.

    Real cooks don't need no stinkin aprons!



  7. Okay, I am seriously impressed at your MacGyver quote.

    I don't care how bad the show was, I still loved it, and I can even tell you the episode that quote came from.

    Hi, I'm Auntie J, and I'm a MacGyver addict.

  8. Apropos, absolutely nothing... except you've given me so many smiles over the past couple of years, I thought I'd try to return the favor.

    Being a Firefly fan (as am I), I bet you will this... The music's great and the montage is superb! I hope the link comes through (alternate included). I hope I've given you a smile back.

    Look up on youtube: (as the link probably won't work...)

    Welcome to the family Simon/Kaylee Firefly

    Cap'n Jan

  9. Consistently lopsided cakes could indicate an oven issue. Turning the dial to 350 doesn't always result in an oven at 350, and some home ovens have crazy temperature swings before the thermostat clicks.

    Fortunately, unless your oven has more circuit boards than a PC, fixes are cheap.

  10. I like some angel food cake, but not as much as something deep and heavy, a death by chocolate torte that is distinguishable from a solid block of 90% dark chocolate in that the dark chocolate is a little more fluffy and airy.

    Angelfood cake is like... dessert dessert. Especially if there's ice cream.

  11. My ex had a distressingly limited repertoire, consisting of canned asparagus, premixed, prewashed salad, and poached salmon.
    Considering what kids will eat, that repertoire has extended to include hot dogs.

    My brother used to regularly say to my mom when she made something new, "needs hotsauce". At least he did until I said it when HE made something.

  12. "Geoffrey! Fetch me my baking trousers!"

    "Welcome to the Family" - Simon/Kaylee - Firefly - YouTube

    Hmmm, those brandied cherries Mrs. Drang made should be ready...

  13. Auntie J - Awesome!

    Cap'n Jan - it didn't come through. But thanks for the thoughts.

    Roscoe - my favorite homestead has a gas oven that's probably 60 years old. To say it's fussy is an understatement. EJ can make a souffle in it, I can't even heat up ravioli, but I'm getting better at it.

    og - it's hard to beat Midwest Chick's brownie cookies if you want a piece of black hole of cookie goodness.

    Windy - I have a professional friend who absolutely adores his wife, watching them together is like watching teenagers in the first blush of love, after two grown kids, but she lives on salad and steamed chicken and that's all that's on the table. I sneak him in little tupperwares of extra hot and cheesy stuff when I'm by his office.

    Drang - you made me spill my beer. HAHAHAHA!

    fetch my trousers. . .:-)

  14. We've been through two ovens in our rental in less than two years, and the house is only seven years old.

    Mrs. Roscoe actually misses the 20 year old electric oven we had in FL. It was cranky, but we knew its temperature error and used a baking stone to smooth out the swings. Plus it was analog -- no circuit boards to break.


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